UNPUBLISHEDNOTDEAD!

What are you afraid of?  Why do you put down the keyboard and commit to living the life of the non-believers; the people who sit on subways or in BMWs driving along being bombarded by other people’s lives and not their own.  What is your fear?   Do you fear the eyes that stare at your words, not knowing where they came from, and taking them and creating their own images, and their own ideas.  Do you fear that they will not appreciate your efforts, or your engagement in the art?  Do you fear they will mock you or shun your thoughts, your metaphors … your mental pictures?  Do you fear the rabid emotions that you cannot control, or do you fear the enviable lack of emotions?  Do you fear control?  Do you fear your ability to sway or move or argue?  Do you fear the argument?  Do you fear the rigors of the constant questions regarding your labors?

Do you fear the work?  Do you fear the motion of your hands, or the ringing in your brain of nothing more than fingers hitting the keyboard in random patterns making sounds that are deafening in their synchronicity?  Do you fear the sentences that will need to merge, or the words which need to sing?  Do you fear the thoughts which will need to form other thoughts, and not just your own, but someone elses?  Do you fear the thoughts?  Do you fear the belly of your beast, or just your belly turning at the disgust in your condition?  Do you fear the condition?  Do you fear that we live in a conditional world where we are a victim of time and place?   Where you can’t express things people won’t hear, and you can’t hear things people don’t express?

Do you fear the story?  Do you fear the tears?  Do you fear you will write something so deep and so revaluating that it will tear up your soul just to exfoliate it from your mind?  Do you fear yourself?  Do you toil in a world where you find solace in not knowing who you are, who what you’re about?  What are you afraid of?